The True and Terrible Tale of Evil Ed Gooch
 Intermediate II 1985
Cast:

Ed Gooch: Michael (Ed.) Gooch Raymond BrYan Gooch: Raymond BrYan Fulton
Ed's voice: Richard Pepper Joe Gooch: Joe Gandier
Marja Gooch: Marja Valiharju Ken Gooch: Ken Wilson
James Gooch: James Friesen Ken Gooch: Ken Francis
Shawn Gooch: Shawn Friesen

Scene One

All is dark. A shadowy figure (Ed) is seen carrying a lantern and traps. Through the P.A. system he introduces himself as Ed Gooch and this is his story. Exit. His voice functions as narrator for the rest of the skit.

Scene Two

Ed tells how he moved to this area in '32 as a happy, young trapper seeking his fortune. He built his home on thie property now next-to-next door to the camp. (Ed acts this out.)

Scene Three

Ed sits staring at a burning Pic coil. He explains how he was bored and needed a wife to light Pic for him. So he went to the Hoito and met a waitress there. She couldn't speak English and so she couldn't object when he proposed.

Scene Four (Family Portrait)

They got married and had six kids: James Gooch, Shawn Gooch, Raymond or BrYan Gooch, Joe Gooch, Ken Gooch and their other brother Ken Gooch (the black sheep of the family).

Scene Five

Ed sits staring at burning Pic and begins to laugh madly. He explains how eventually Pic addled his brains.

Scene Six

The family is seated around the dinner table with Ed at the head. He explains how they played "Lottoscrape" after supper. They do so. The one chosen had to scrape the dishes and later that same night... (lights out--scream!) The next morning the child chosen would be gone. (He exits in the dark.) Ed had thrown him down the well. (This is done three times. Finally, Marja and the remaining sons leave, as Marja babbles something at Ed in Finn.)

Ed explains how a skeleton was found hanging in his house and some think he killed himself, but no one knows for sure. He begins to threaten Andy to get off the new property. (Actually, he forgot to do so.) Suddenly, someone notices Ed outside walking (with his characteristic limp and lantern) away from the dining hall, gesturing menacingly at these gathered at the windows to witness this incredible sight. (Better yet would have been to have had Mike as Ed still inside while another Ed--the ''real" one--was outside.)

FINIS
The (True and Terrible) Ballad of (Evil) Ed Gooch
Thursday Aug. 22, 1985 by Richard Pepper 

E                          E7
Gather 'round children and I'll sing a song 
        A                       Am
'bout a happy young trapper and how he went wrong.
   E                     E7 
He came to this area without cat or pooch. 
A                     D         E 
This is the ballad of evil   Ed Gooch.

   E                        E7
He came to this town in the year thirty-two, 
    A                     Am
But trap and burn Pic was all he could do.
  E                     E7    
A wife to light Pic and sometimes to smooch 
    A                      D           E
Was sought at the Hoito by lonely   Ed Gooch.

   E                       E7
He got no response when he asked her, "How are ya?" 
A                          Am
English was foreign to the ears of Miss Marja.
        E                           E7
But she was almost pretty and could serve hash and hooch, 
      A                        D           E
So Ed took her to church to be Mrs.     Ed Gooch.

E                          E7                  
James, Shawn and BrYan and Joe were born then. 
A                            Am
Ken and his brother, who was also named Ken.
    E                         E7
The table was so crowded they all had to skooch. 
    A                    D          E
The once happy family of evil    Ed Gooch.

E                 D              
Three dead bodies down the well. 
A                 E
Three dead bodies down the well.
E                 D              
Three dead bodies down the well. 
A                     E    
Ed pushed them in and down they fell.

    E                           E7        
But Pic made the brains of poor Ed become ill. 
   A                         Am
He played Lottoscrape and at night Lottokill.
E                           E7
Three down the well with an awful kersplooch, 
    A                   D           E
The unlucky children of evil     Ed Gooch.

Three dead bodies...

E                        E7
What came of Ed when his fam'ly left him, 
   A                     Am
We don't really know. It could be quite grim.
E                        E7
Some see his lantern and say he's no mooch. 
         A                        D           E
He still kills for a living: that evil     Ed Gooch.

Three dead bodies....

E                          E7
Ed's land was sold to make a new camp site. 
    A                     Am
So, Ed and his fam'ly met Andy one night:
     E                   E7
"Get offa my land or you will die if yooch - 
A                     D          E
Oose to remain!" said evil    Ed Gooch.

Three dead bodies....

The Bible Camp at the gates of Hell. 
(Sung simultaneously with "Ed pushed them....".)






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