**=Phantom theme on organ.

Narrator: There are many mysteries surrounding Dorion Bible Camp: Where do Elaine's pencils go? Why are there usually at least six vehicles parked past the "No vehicles past this point" sign? Who does Dicky Marvellous' hair and why? But no mystery is greater than the mysterious affair of (dramatic pause) The Phantom of the Dining Hall.**

Little is known of this shadowy figure, his origins being shrouded in conjecture and legend, giving rise to a number of questions, the deepest of which is this: How can he be much of a mysterious Phantom when every time he appears, great blaring theme music is played?

(Enter Phantom. ** He shakes his fist at music and exits.)

Many years ago Camp Dorion was taken over by Monsieur Andre and his Prima Donna, Charlotta, and all their pets. At times their pets were so numerous that the Camp was said to be run by Andre and vermin.

(Enter Andre and Charlotta) Soon they noticed that Camp life was not all rosy and wonderful. Small things began to annoy them: weeds, mice, chipmunks, insects, children. (Mime.) What was causing all these annoyances-or who? Little did they realize that deep in the bowels of the old dining hall lived a lonely, haunted, twisted creature who dreamed of the glory and fame that could be his, were he to run the Camp.

All the problems of Camp were of his making, especially the mosquitoes, the result of a genetic experiment involving piranhas, vampire bats and humming birds. These pests were his special emissaries, the very embodiment of his warped character and he alone held the solution to their ravages, which he soon made available to Andre --at a hefty profit.

(During songs Andre, Charlotta and Phantom mime.)

Narrator: The mosquito situation became so bad that Andre had installed the giant Pic coil you see above your heads in order to prevent the campers from being distracted by bugs during his ten minute introduction to Camp life.

Soon the Phantom's hopes began to centre on a young kitchen girl named MissTeen Dry,eh? whom he hoped to train as a champion pillowfighter, but his plans were confused by the entrance of a charming assistant counsellor into her life. This young man's name was Faoul. (They enter and gaze into each other's eyes.)

In an attempt to scuttle their relationship, the Phantom sent another of his emissaries their way-a Primary camper. (Enter camper. Mime.)

(Faoul gives the camper a chocolate bar and the camper exits.)

Narrator: In a rage of insane jealousy, the Phantom unleashed upon the camp a disaster beyond their imagination.**

(Phantom screams "go" and the giant Pic "chandelier" falls on the crowd.)

(Phantom appears in Dicky Marvellous suit and hands a script to Andre and exits.)

Narrator: At the Awards Dinner for Teens Two the Phantom handed Andre the script for a skit he had written and ordered that it be performed the next week. The title: "Don Tulloch Triumphant", the earthy story of men and women seduced into working on the dining hall by the promise of chocolate chip cookies and pie at coffee break.

In this scene of the Phantom's skit we see Don, portrayed by the Phantom, taking a bit of time off and enjoying a football game. His team is a point behind and he is giving his intructions to his centre played by MissTeen.

(Phantom knocks out the organist with a pillow. In the huddle MissTeen pulls his mask off, sees his face and screams. The audience does not see his face. They both run off in opposite directions.)

Narrator: We won't see any more scenes from the Phantom's skit because Richard couldn't figure out the music.

The Phantom has lost. All his hopes are dashed of ever turning MissTeen into a champion pillowfighter. In the daze of emotions she feels for Faoul she can't even remember to keep her hand to the level of her eyes to ward off those illegal headshots. The Phantom is crushed. Allow yourselves to feel a touch of compassion as we bid adieu to Edrik, for that is his name, the Phantom of the Dining Hall.

(Waits for music. None. Phantom sits and "plays" organ during song.)

(Phantom reveals smiling normal face and says, "Hi folks". Audience reacts in horror. He wraps his cloak about himself and disappears behind the organ. The cast assembles and sings. Phantom joins them for the second half of the song.)